Cocky Comedy

Cocky comedy (or "cocky-funny") is a teasing style of flirting: playful arrogance mixed with humour, so she can't quite tell when you're joking. Done right it's never mean. It's the banter of a confident older brother.

The mindset

Act as if she's the one trying to win you over, and you're amused by it. Some frames to play with:

• She's your bratty little sister.
• She's on a game show where she wins a prize if she seduces you, and you're making it hard.
• You have impossibly high standards that she's not quite meeting yet.

The author says it works across ages. He jokes like this with a young niece and an elderly aunt alike, and usually gets a laugh and a playful shove.

The rules

• Hold slightly higher status, but only slightly. Too far above and she thinks she has no chance.
• Deliberately misread what she says, and treat innocent comments as her flirting with you.
• Dodge direct questions with absurd answers before giving a real one. "What do you do?" "I test mattresses professionally. Very demanding." Then answer properly.
• Don't chase or court.
• Light teasing about her "not being cool enough yet", then change the subject ("anyway…").
• Give things on your terms: "Can you pass my bag?" "Maybe. What's in it for me?"
• Keep a straight face. Don't laugh at your own jokes.
• Bait and switch: start a sentence like a compliment and swerve at the end, or the other way round. Example written for this page: "That jacket is honestly great. Really bold choice… did it come free with a tent?"
• It's a flirting style. It usually falls flat with other men.

Calibration

The author found it worked better before he got in shape. Once he was fitter, the same lines came across as arrogant, and he had to tone it down and be warmer. The more status you already show, the less cockiness you need.

Keep rejection in perspective

His rough estimate: of 100 women you approach, only around 30 are open to meeting someone right then. Some of those aren't into your type, want something different, or don't enjoy this kind of humour. Only a handful will be both available and right for you. Rejection after doing everything right is normal. You're one step closer.

See also

• Common Shit Tests
• The Qualification Manifesto
• Indicators of Interest
• Approaching To Getting HER Number

Summary of a post on the cocky-funny style shared online around 2014.