OK Cupid Profile
A case study in writing a dating profile that polarises: deliberately appealing strongly to the people you want, even if it puts others off. The original poster, newly single and focused on career and fitness, shared his profile for feedback.
What he was trying to show
- A sense of humour, shown rather than claimed ("I have a good sense of humour" proves nothing).
- That he's intellectual and curious, to attract like-minded women.
- A little controversy, to show he isn't needy, without going too far.
- Ambition and a commitment to self-improvement.
- A balance of goofy and normal, so he still comes across as a regular guy.
- A hint of sexuality, kept tasteful.
Techniques he used
- A running joke. His sections were written as if by a scientist describing a human ("bipedal organism", "mammalian social rituals"). It's consistent, memorable and funny.
- Real substance underneath. One section stayed plain: his job, his plan to travel the world for 6–12 months, then go back to study.
- Specific interests. The Stoics, Theodore Roosevelt's story of beating asthma by training, a list of favourite shows and films. Specific is more attractive than generic.
- Self-aware humour about himself: always waiting until something is a classic before watching it.
- A playful "must-have" list that mixes the absurd with the sincere.
- Clear "message me if" criteria: you read books, you have opinions about pizza. It invites the right people.
The alternate version
He also drafted a parody profile built entirely from online-dating clichés ("I'm different", "I love to laugh") with deliberate spelling mistakes. Funny for people who get the joke, but riskier.
Takeaways for your own profile
- Pick a tone and commit to it.
- Show traits through stories and details; don't list adjectives.
- Mix humour with something real about your life and plans.
- Accept that a good profile won't appeal to everyone, and that's the point.
See also
Summary of a profile-review post originally shared on Reddit (2015).