Meditating helps you let go of:
What is oneitis? It’s attachment. Buddhism teaches us that attachment is the source of suffering. We are afraid to loose what we are attached to. Thus the way to happiness is to not get attached. Buddhist monks are really the ultimate MGTOW. The buddhists knows that everything comes and goes, everything is impermanent. The seasons, day and night, friendships, happiness, hardship, relationships and life itself. Nothing lasts forever. Meditating is about accepting this and to find peace in the present moment, whatever the present entails.
Are you afraid to try new things and take risks? Chances are that you have a big fragile ego which is gonna break if you fail. Thus you procrastinate and drag out projects forever. You’re a perfectionist and you’re afraid to put that ”final” stamp on a project, because what if it doesn’t live up to your expectations?
- The past and the future
The past is the past. It can be a fun and cringeworthy exercise to think about ones bp-past but dwelling to much on past mistakes and what could’ve been will bring you down. The future isn’t much better. Fantasising about a brighter future will take away from your ability to take action in the present moment. And agonizing about future disasters creates anxiety.
- Outcome dependance
Whatever happens you accept it. Whatever happens you can find peace in the present moment and brush of rejection. I think this is crucial to keep a self-amused frame.
I used to be in a constant mode of flight and fight. A constantly semi-activated stress response doesn’t only limits your ability to socialize, but also effects your physical health. You’re body’s ability for repair and maintenance will be limited.
One of the changes I've seen
I have been meditating for 2-3 hours every day for roughly 4 months in 2 of which i was living with monks. In the past my voice was very unpredictable. It could be baritone deep and grounded, often in the morning, but as the day went on and as I accumulated anxiety and tension in my upper body my voice would tense up, become shallow and nasal. Now thanks to meditating, Im always grounded and my voice reflects this.
If you think you could benefit then please try it out. I found a real gem of a reply on how to meditate hidden in an asktrp-thread recently. It’s written by u/analphaguy so instead of writing my own how to, which wouldn’t be nearly as good, I’ll borrow u/analphaguy's excellent rundown. I hope he doesn’t mind. Here goes:
Never use tools when meditating. No music. No binaurals. Nothing. Just a quiet place where you won't be disturbed for the period you are meditating. First thing to train is your attention span and focus.
- Close your eyes, go into half-lotus pose (google it) or if you can, full-lotus. Place your hands in a mudra as follows: Right hand over left hand, thumbs touching. Spine straight but relaxed, make sure ears are over shoulders. Can place a cushion under the tailbone to elevate and ensure a "grounding" with your leg posture.
- Now, feel your body. Be aware of every single part of it. Be aware that you're breathing. Feel your muscles, where is it tense? Where is it relaxed? Where does it feel hot? Cold? Warm? Queasy? Painful? Exhausted? etc. Be completely aware of your whole body. That trains your physical mindfulness.
- Next, I want you to think of your mind as a projector screen. The images come and go. You will find that your brain is amazingly active - like a chatterbox that never stops talking. One thought leads to another and another and another. But what prolongs one thought is when you actively participate in that thought - otherwise, its natural action is to dissipate away. Every thought comes and goes. For now, just watch your mind and realize how insane the mind can be. This is known as mental mindfulness.
- Now, you start training your attentional focus. This is known as Anapanasati - or breath mindfulness. Let your body do what it wants naturally - do not force or try to assume control over it. Just try and watch your breath for now. Let it go out, let it go in - at no point should you be trying to hold breath, inhaling by effort, etc. Like the thought, simply watch it like a 4d projector screen.
- You will realize that as you observe the breath more, you will see that there are various properties of the breath.You may choose to focus on the tip of your nose and feel the following sensations:
- The breath is composed of 4 stages - the inhalation, the pause, the exhalation, the pause. Realize that when the breath inhales or exhales, the mind starts to move. When the pause is there, the mind seems to "quieten" down. Eventually, the longer you meditate, this pause will become longer and longer - to the point where you seem like you're not breathing (very, very shallow breaths because your body does not require that much oxygen when you are still).
- You can also focus on the fluidity of the breath. At some point, if you practice, the breath can become what I call the "honey-breath" - where there is no division between inhalation or exhalation.
- You can be mindful of the temperature and speed of the breath. When breath is taken in, it is cold and at room temperature. When exhaled, it is warmer and at body temperature.
- You should continue your meditation practice everyday. Doing meditation at least 15 minutes a day is much better than doing it 2 hours at a go in one week. Within a few weeks, you will see amazing results.
- When you get more advanced, you may reach states of euphoria or bliss - or you might see lights that burst from under your eyelids, causing you to be "absorbed" within - This is what is known as samadhi. It takes place in many forms, often, it comes when you absolutely "let go" - or everything in your mind or body. Absolute surrender. That's when you go into this absorptive state. If you wake up from your meditation feeling a "buzz of energy" or your vision seems to become very "bright", then you know that you have reached a high attentional state. Meditation should not end with lethargy, dullness, sadness, etc.
Meditation should be done for spiritual and mental development, though the focus must never be on its benefits. It is important to simply have the idea of "letting go" or "giving" or just basically a form of compassion. Source: Meditated for nearly a decade, under advice of monks.
I would only like to add one thing. You don't have to sit in a lotus posture. If you find lotus uncomfortable, get a pillow under your ass and try the japanese seiza-posture
If you try it out and you find meditation beneficial. Do yourself a favor and attend a 10-day meditation retreat if possible. Yes it will make you a bit of a hippie-faggot but it’s well worth the ego-blow.